About Me

I am an insane human being. I have been a wife for 15 plus years, and a mom for almost as long. I had 3 children early on...then struggled with life and IF and loss for 8 years. Thought our family was complete, so I compensated by adopting all the shelter pets. Then we were surprised that our luck changed. Our running total is Parents: 2, Kids: 5, Pets:4. My life is far from perfect, and much of our happiness was hard fought and won, from the death of a parent, job loss and marriage troubles, miscarriage and IF, we have been through it all, and dare I say we made it, with a lot of love and laughter, and not taking ourselves too seriously.

Sunday, March 5, 2017

These Days

It's a little after 8am on a Friday. I woke up way early having to pee despite really wanting to sleep straight through after last night. The wind was so strong and intense that the power went out, and the entire house was up. I couldn't get settled until everyone was done waking up in confusion hearing the wind wail in the pitch black. We have a lot of trees, when it's windy it's very noisy on the second floor.

So far this morning we have nursed,sent older ones off to school and Daddy off to work, ended a meltdown, had our morning banana and milk, played a game of catch on the stairs and then included the one dog and we all played catch with her and her toy too, cuddled on the couch, and playing in the living room. It's almost time for me to make breakfast. I've been waking up hungry but waited because the boys need time to play first. Despite the headachey, tired way I feel in the mornings (thanks weather for those things) today things feel relatively calm and serene. Which is often not the case. My mornings are usually very noisy, with older kids arguing for a spot in the mirror, or a missing jacket, and the littlest ones decide they need to add to that and there are tears for attention and breakfast and attention. Those days have a way to make the day start crappy.

Today won't stay like this. There will be moments of meltdowns and tantrums that test my patience and force me to have to do a mental reset. Today is ordinary. We have no special plans, other than to figure out a meatless dinner in this first Friday of Lent. It's cold outside. Very cold. It's germ season, when some really nasty bugs circulate, so we would be avoiding playgrounds anyway. There are already toys spilled all over the floor. There is a ton of laundry to do.

But these are the days and the moments that fill my heart. These ordinary days are the days I am going to miss the most when they are over. These may be the lasts of the firsts I will ever have. I am trying to appreciate all the little moments I have with them, in this life.

I had to take a break writing this because the boys went from happy to hangry in a hot second. We had breakfast, did the dishes, picked up messes, went and played upstairs in the boys room (where I let them pull all the stuffed friends and blankets off the beds and bounce and play), picked up the kids' bathroom, and one of us got to take a nap. I also went through the closet looking for a few smaller clothing items I needed, gathered up the dirty laundry, played dress up in winter clothes, picked up another big mess that required a broom, sliced an apple for a snack, and called in to pay a bill(because they charge you to pay online and I refuse, also I never have stamps), and am getting ready to make lunch.

This life, it's not glamorous. It's not fancy. It's not rich in money. But it's rich in love and laughter, and sticky, slobbery kisses, and big unending messes. But I love it just the same.

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